The idea that “everything is happening for me” was something that previously evoked irritation, frustration, and even anger, within me.
“Really?!!!” I’d think, “how in the world is painful chronic illness or having an extremely overstimulated nervous system, ‘happening for me’?” I figured that whomever coined this phrase had clearly not suffered the way I had.
What really bothered me about this sentiment is that it felt like a spiritual platitude which sounded really good in theory, but lacked depth of understanding and did little to help me actually feel better. It also felt like it was missing compassion, and it turns out, that was something I needed in order to heal.
What do I mean by this?
Well, I came to realize that while everything absolutely IS happening for me, and that we are given endless opportunities to grow and change around our ‘stuck points’ and patterns, and that the meaning we give something provides the quality of our experience, and that everything is truly divine in its essence (including us)…
…the parts of me that felt hurt, sad, embarrassed, shut down, judgmental, overwhelmed, sick, tired, cranky, upset, angry, frustrated, totally missed, blamed, etc. needed to feel heard, loved and validated in order to heal. Only then, could I embrace the divinity in everything and the idea that I was an empowered co-creator of my experience, and not merely a victim of circumstance.
Here is the catch…
I was the one who needed to learn how to listen to, love and validate those parts of me.
(I was the one in need of my own loving compassion.)
And once I learned how to do this, I stopped looking outside of myself for these things. I released the need for others to “heal” these parts of me. I became the one to give all of these things to myself. And I began to soften, open, change and heal on many levels.
I was then able to fully embrace the idea that “everything is happening for me” as an empowering way to remember:
1. To love myself even more.
2. To give myself what I’m looking for from others.
3. To find the silver lining in what may seem like the darkest most dismal situations.
4. That I get to to provide the meaning to EVERYTHING in my life.
5. And finally, that everything is always in Divine order.
Most of us were not taught how to love and nurture ourselves.
The great news is that it’s never too late to learn this skill. Yes, self love is a skill. And it can take practice to refine and to even “feel” real sometimes. So if you’ve never told yourself “I love you” it may feel phony, inauthentic or even contrived at first. That’s okay. This is totally normal and it will shift. The key is to love yourself through everything that arises (including resistance) and stay the course to becoming the kindest and most loving person to yourself all the time.
So how do you do this? Simply place your hand on your heart and say “I love you” to yourself.
Saying “I love you” to the parts of you that feel broken, hurt, unworthy and even unlovable, is deeply transformative. This one action alone (saying “I love you” to your own heart) has the power to completely revolutionize your entire life, as it will open the door to viewing everything as a beautiful useful part of your journey. It will open your heart. It will dissolve inner wounds. It will set you free.
Now that I’ve learned how to do this in a way that feels authentic and aligned, I am better able to be in service, and to guide other souls in this process on even deeper levels and in more powerful profound ways.
May you all be blessed, one “I love you” at a time as you remember that everything is truly happening for you. This is all a part of what I call, The Alchemy of Awakening.